Here we are again. Though I'm not exactly regular with this, am I?
1: Vanity really bothers me. People who can't stop looking at themselves in mirrors drive me fucking insane. Which is bad, because I have a 15-y-o stepdaughter. And she's at the age where she can't leave the house without make-up, despite having wonderful skin and looking fantastic without any at all. Kids, eh? T'choh.
2: Little known fact, but true story: men do prefer women without make-up on. I don't like kissing a woman and coming away with enough powder, foundation and lipstick on my face to double as Coco the Clown. I want to know what you look like; back when I used to be in the market, I thought there were few things more annoying than going to bed with someone who looks one way and wakes up looking really quite different. It's up there with the Wonderbra in terms of woman-to-man fraud. Chicks, eh? T'choh.
3: I am doing this instead of working. Tee hee!
4: My running bookazine launches end of March and will be available in 34 countries, I'm told. It's called Just Run. Exciting!
5: We saw my dog's nemesis this morning; an evil tyrant dog called Kiwi. Kiwi has gone for Millie three times, drawing blood once. Millie is terrified of Kiwi. I suggested strongly that third time (THREE FUCKING TIMES - WHY IS THE FUCKING THING NOT ON A FUCKING LEAD???) that they might consider putting the fuckshit on a lead in future. As a result of Kiwi's actions, I now have a zero tolerance policy on any dog seriously attacking Millie.
6: I'm cold. My feet are fucking freezing.
7: I signed up to Twitter recently. Far more fun that Fartbook.
8: To my eternal shame, I am following at least three former Biggest Loser USA contestants.
9: I'm not sure my sense of humour will carry well on Twitter, so I aim to refrain from posting anything about the Baby Jesus and how he's in my top-five babies of all time, or anything even vaguely controversial. Just in case. I'll wait a couple of weeks.
10: Apparently, there is a fish which mimics the mimic octopus. How cool is that?? I can't find the link to the newer story, so you'll have to make do with looking in wonderment at the MO. It ROCKS.
11: Too busy. Just too fucking damn bastarding busy.
12: Eye test today. Will also look at some new glasses.
13: My wife had her hair cut yesterday, and it is based a little on the leading lady in the movie Monsters. The haircut on my lovely wife looks absolutely bloody gorgeous. Monsters is a fab film, btw.
14: With a good haircut in it. I think she may have copied that off my wife...
15: I thought I might have beer tonight, but I am holding off until tomorrow night to have a shandy with my wife. That means long run tomorrow instead of Sunday, but it also means lie-in on Sunday! I may stay in bed until 8am!!
16: I also have to work all weekend. This is not ideal, but deadlines insist.
17: I have to spend the bext part of a week in London in 9 days. I am not a fan of London.
18: I don't think it likes me much, either.
19: Fondest London memory: a friend spending a happy 20 minutes underneath Big Ben asking people if they had the time.